I will pre-empt this by saying I have grieved over Bowie. Over Prince. Over countless people who made positive imprints on the world. Over cousins and aunts and uncles and in that moment, all death seems blindingly visible. There is death. Death feels like it can take and steal. Death is most visible when someone famous or noteworthy dies. People flock. People spend weeks lamenting over a figure that represented something or the World thought was important. But death also is invisible. Death takes the aunts, uncles, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, and friends. Invisible death hurts. Invisible death is personal and lasts. Death happens every day. My mother says it seems there are a lot of people dying lately because they were visible. Because they were admired by the public. Invisible death is also there. Every day. Every second. Invisible death sometimes can be the most visible to people around it. One thing is the same. Death exists. Everything and everyone die...
Today of all days is a day of grief. This week has been a week of supreme grief and closure. What is grief though? Is grief the loss that drives to sadness and depression? Or is grief something else? Grief has been a prevalent force in my life since before I was born. I was named after a dead person. The reason I am still alive is because a dead person. Hell, the reason I am in College is because a dead person. I was in a car accident in April. For more than a month after I grieved over the loss of self and loss of friendship to the person who was driving. I would find myself crying and it took a while to recover. Today seven months later I closed the last chapter of the ensuing loss of friendship and finally gained closure over what happened. This feeling comes after grief. Grief. Grief kept me alive and nearly tore me apart.
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